Social connection is a lot like the weather - we all talk about it, but no one does anything about it. This newsletter is here to change that: to raise awareness about the importance of connection and create a space for real conversation.

Sports are a fantastic way to build social connections. It’s why every great sports book, movie and tv show is ultimately about human relations: Ted Lasso, Friday Night Lights, and Hoosiers to name a few. Except for Happy Gilmore: that was all about beating the pants off of Shooter McGavin.   

I’m sorry that you are feeling the impact of loss in your social connections, but you are right on the mark to think of social networks like investment portfolios. You might have areas of concentration, but you want to make sure that your social connections are broad and diversified. Research has shown that social network size is positively associated with psychological resilience, while more intense, more focused social networks carry risk of disruptive events leading to loneliness or depression.  

In terms of what to do, first consider how you might maintain your connections with your exercise buddies. It may be that exercise is what brought you together, but hopefully that is not the entirety of your relationships. So, grab a coffee, arrange a barbeque, stay in the group chats, or show up socially to events even if you can’t participate athletically.   

You might also consider whether it was the particular sport that attracted you or, even with your injury, there are other substitute exercise activities that could fill your need for action and interaction – and perhaps might pose less of a risk of disruptive injury.  Think swimming instead of base jumping. Or Tai Chi instead of bull riding. 

Truthfully, I think everyone should start playing Bridge. It’s a great game, it keeps your brain active and it’s inherently social – just avoid the cheaters. https://www.newyorker.com/sports/sporting-scene/the-great-bridge-boycott.  But if card games aren’t for you, consider volunteer opportunities at animal shelter, join a book group, take a class at your community college, hook up with your neighborhood association, find a relevant professional group or get involved in your church if you have one.   

There are endless outlets for your energy.  The key is identifying a handful of opportunities that connect with your interest and passion and then investing the time and energy to build social connections. I suspect that if you bring the same passion that you have for exercise to these other activities, you will do great.   

Consider this an opportunity in disguise. It's forcing you to build what investment advisors call “uncorrelated assets”: friendships that don't all depend on the same conditions to thrive. 

Good luck Kara! 

Do you have a social connection question for Ken?

This Week in Social Connection

Here is a sentence you won’t often see: We have good news for the fans of the Cleveland Browns, Chicago White Sox and Washington Wizards, and all other perennial losing teams.   

New research shows that identifying with a group, like a sports team, can meaningfully boost our social well-being.  And the key is not rooting for the best teams. When people feel a strong sense of belonging to a group, they gain powerful social benefits: trust in others, a shared sense of purpose, and the feeling that everyone is on the same team. Team success has little to do with the group connection; indeed, a long record of futility may even create stronger group solidarity and identify. As one of the researchers reported, “supporting a team with a poor win-loss record can sometimes provide even greater psychological benefits. We believe this is partly because such benefits arise from the community formed around sport teams — as demonstrated in the current study — rather than from the short-term happiness associated with winning.” 

So members of the Dawg Pound in Cleveland, or the denizens of Raider Nation or, if you prefer fictional football teams in the UK, the fans of Ted Lasso and AFC Richmond, all of you can rejoice in the fellowship and solidarity of the group and the joys of sharing sporting futility.  It’s better than winning the championship. 

Social Connection in the News

We hope this all makes you feel better about obsessively reading every article (and there are a lot of them) about Deshawn Watson, Shedeur Sanders, and the other 40 or so quarterbacks who have started games for the Browns this century.   

It might be your entrée into the world of “bloomscrolling”. Most of us by now are familiar with the concept of doomscrolling and the psychological (and even physiological) toll it can take on people. The dangers of doomscrolling have spawned a small, countermovement to reject algorithms and instead follow creators who inspire, accounts that educate, and communities that foster connection.  Intentional, positive interactions are linked to better mental health and stronger feelings of social connection.  Even small moments - like seeing encouraging content or supportive interactions - can boost feelings of belonging and reduce loneliness. In this way, social media can still do what it was meant to do: bring people closer. 

That begs the question of where to find these happy places in social media.  It’s not easy but here are some recommendations to check out from HT100 team: 

Courtney Cook - A lifestyle creator who became popular for “eating lunch with you” from her teaching desk at school.  

Geoff and Sue - An older couple who travels together and documents their journey. 

Serena Neel - A (sometimes chaotic) but funny creator who builds interesting creations throughout her home. 

Where is Jessica - A professional hiker who documents her journey and takes you along with her. 

The Wreath Company - A cozy and comforting crafting creator who makes all kinds of colorful pompom accessories. 

Chef Tini - A cooking and recipe creator known for upbeat food content that makes cooking feel fun. 

Cost N Mayor - A fun and funky dance couple who recreate trending moves. 

And finally, we would not be true to this newsletter’s spirit of shameless self-promotion if we didn’t mention the joys of the GrandPeople account on Instagram and its uplifting stories about the second half of life. Coming soon, a story on Gerald Stratford and his uncommonly large and entertaining vegetables. 

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